Last night started off innocently enough. I was nearly asleep when I heard my dog (a dachshund named Gunner) barking like crazy. I got up, put on my slippers, grabbed my baseball bat, and walked around the house in my boxers to make sure everything was okay. I found nothing and went back to bed. Minutes later- Gunner was going nuts again.

I sprung from my bed, grabbed my bat, followed Gunner, and he led me straight to my front door. I stepped outside and found a paper bag sitting on my porch and it was on fire. I quickly stomped on it to put out there first when I felt it- the mush of poop all over my slipper. I was furious. Having done this trick myself as a teen, I thought I’d just gotten punked.

Then I heard snickering from across the street and saw two figures walking away. So I began to pursue and confront the kids. Gunner quickly passed me and chased after the two figures and began to attack them. I caught up to the situation and discovered that Gunner had not attacked a couple of kids- but a couple of old ladies. This was just the beginning.

I calmed Gunner down and apologized to the ladies. They told me they put the poo on the porch because my dog pooped in their yard earlier that day. I knew it wasn’t my dog’s poo because he doesn’t wander around the neighborhood. As I tried to explain this to the ladies- some guy came running out of his house and just nailed me from behind. I was stunned and he held me down with my face in the snow- while also trying to keep Gunner off of him.

Once again, I tried to explain the situation, but then a cop quickly showed up, locked up my dog, cuffed me, and began to question me. I guess a guy with bed head carrying a bat outside at night, in just SpongeBob boxers, a shirt, and slippers, confronting two old ladies doesn’t look very good.

I explained the situation to the officer and we all realized that it was a misunderstanding. But the bummer of it all is they took away my dog, Gunner. I just found out that they will put him down at 1:30pm today.

This is really difficult on me and my family. I’m trying to see if we can save Gunner. He really is a good dog.

I’ll keep you posted.

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My peeps know what I mean by that.

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At a coffee shop this morning by a young lady to a couple of friends:

“My parents force me to go to a church school and it makes me want to kill myself.”

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Church planters are the hungriest, quirkiest, obsessive, opinionated, imaginative people around. It was so much fun meeting new friends over the last few days and reconnecting with some others. To me, what made the Churchplanters.com Evolve Conference so great was the people. What I said before, that church planters are like a fraternity, I meant it. I love being around them. I love being one of them.

So pardon me while I give some love and shout outs.

One of the coolest things is being able to pick people’s brains and listen to their stories. Most of these folks are further down the road than I am, so I soaked all their advice, wisdom, disappointments, and experiences in. Such was the case in my breakfast with Chris Elrod at the Waffle House. Chris gets credit for being the first person to ever have breakfast with me at a Waffle House. There are 18,719 of them in Atlanta alone. They are EVERYWHERE! Anyways, Chris is a pastor and church planter of Compass Point Church in Lakeland, FL. He and I met last year and hit it off. This year, he was kind enough to wake up early and treat me to breakfast and wisdom. Chris’ story is just remarkable and I would advise that all church planters get to know him. There’s no BS-ing Chris. He’s pretty much seen and experienced it all. A lot of wisdom in that man. He’s a straightshooter and a real cool guy. I’m happy to say that Chris Elrod is my homeboy.

Another cool couple I spent a good chunk of time with was Lloyd and Esther Owens. They are a blast! Lloyd is planting a church in downtown Atlanta called, “A Peculiar Place.” I really love their heart and their passion. Like me, he is sitting on the runway with the engine going and ready to go. Really cool to hang out with people like Lloyd and his better half, Esther. Lloyd says he’s my brother from another mother.

Unfortunately, I didn’t pull out my camera until the end of the conference so I missed a lot of photo opps.

I had dinner with Boyd Bettis and Scott Magdalein and their wives. They are super cool people. I’ve read both of their blogs but it was sweet to visit with them over dinner. Boyd is introspective and insightful. He’s an incredible guy. Scott’s got a quick wit and a brilliant mind. He’ll probably disagree- but it’s true. Both of them together is a good combination. In fact, they are brothers-in-law. Pretty cool dudes.

Remember this name- Jay Hardwick. Not only does this guy have his stuff together but he’s also the Guitar Hero Tournament Champion of the Evolve Conference. He’s got rock star written all over him. With all that acclaim he is a down-to-earth guy who’s clearly a leader. I enjoyed getting to know him more. Looking forward to seeing how his church plant evolves. Glad to call him my friend.

More people I chatted with but wished we could’ve hung more.

Sean and Sara Alsobrooks and team- Met them last year and to see where they are this year as they lead Knoxville Life Church is inspiring. Love you guys! Wish we could have hung out more.

Michael Lukaszewski- He’s one of my all-time favorite bloggers and it was cool to meet in person. He leads Oak Leaf Church in Cartersville, GA. I picked his brain and bit and he offered some great feedback. Michael is wicked smart and a really good guy.

Gary Lamb- Fires me up and makes me want to be a redneck. I’ve always loved Gary and his balls-to-the-wall approach to ministry. Church planters flock to him like teenage girls to Hannah Montana. I guess that makes him the Hannah Montana of church planting.

J.R. Lee- This dude was kind enough to answer a million questions from me a couple of weeks ago on the phone. He’s even cooler in person. Looking forward to big things for Freedom Church in Acworth, GA.

Mark Ayers- I think he’s somewhat related to J.R. (brothers in-law?) and is prepping to plant Reveal Church in Flowery Branch, GA. Really like this guy’s heart.

Dave and Dana Anderson- The picture in my head of Dana sold-out cheering on her husband during the Guitar Hero tournament will never be forgotten. Awesome!

Scott Pollard- It was fun to reconnect with Scott again. When I met him last year he was where I am this year. Really neat to see how things have progressed for him and the church he’s planting. Great guy.

Tony McCollum- I didn’t get to chat long with Tony but I’ve been a reader of his blog for a while. Super guy and glad we got a chance to meet in person.

Tadd Grandstaff- This guy simply rocks. I was glad I had a chance to visit with him. Tadd was kind enough to answer a few questions I had about launch teams, staffing, etc. I love what he and his team are doing at Pine Ridge Church.

I’m sure I’m leaving some people out but I just wanted to take this opportunity to give some love to these people. Through each interaction they had with me, they left an impression and an investment. So glad to be a part of this wave of church planting.

Filed under: Church Planting, Cool People, Misc., church | 4 Comments

Too many dudes are ignoring proper men’s room protocol these days. Especially in public places like restaurants, businesses, theaters, churches, airports, etc. I don’t know if it’s because they grew up without dad’s, brothers, or what? But somethings gotta change.

Here’s a small list of proper etiquette in the restroom. Please add to it in the comments section and strictly adhere to them.

Urinals

1. Never saddle up next to another dude unless absolutely necessary.
2. Always take the urinal farthest away from another guy.
3. If the option is to stand between two guys or take an empty stall. Take the stall.
4. Don’t talk.
5. Always look straight ahead.
6. Avoid eye contact.
7. If there’s a line, don’t stand behind someone using the urinal. Give them lots of space.
8. Aim (You’d be surprised. Well…maybe not).

Toilets

1. If it’s locked, don’t knock.
2. Don’t talk.
3. Don’t tap your foot.
4. Don’t reach into another stall.
5. Don’t whistle.
6. Don’t externalize a sigh of relief. Keep it inside like all good men.
7. DO courtesy flush.
8. Don’t call someone while doing your business.

And for the good of all mankind, wash your hands with soap. Especially in a public restroom.

To make this world a better place we need to make the men’s room a better place.

Thank you for your cooperation.

Your turn.

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A new blog is coming soon.  Stay tuned.

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This week marks the end of the Sturgis Motorcycle Rally here in the Black Hills of South Dakota. Hundreds of thousands of bikers rumbled through. I wasn’t bothered by all the bikes but I was disturbed by a trend among many of the bikers- the skullet.

What is a skullet? Basically it’s a balding (or bald) man who grows what’s left of his hair long. It kind of looks like the hair that would have been on top of his head slipped down the back his head to create a flowing mane with a chrome dome on top. My plea to all men everywhere is this: say no to the skullet.

There is only one man who can pull of the skullet and still be cool and that is Hulk Hogan. Otherwise, I think a new man law needs to be created stating that those who bear skullets will be pointed at and ridiculed by all men in all situations.

Man law?

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Tags: skullet, skullett, Hulk Hogan, Sturgis,

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Here are ten universal facts about starting a new job:

1. Starting a new job is much like the first day of school.
2. No matter where you work the first day is filled with information overload.
3. You will wonder about what’s going on at your former place of employment.
4. You need a dictionary to translate the lingo of your new job.
5. You will hear stories about your new co-worker’s first day on the job.
6. Just accept the fact that you will get lost in your new building at least once.
7. You might as well be wearing a sign that says, “I’m new.”
8. There’s usually at least one person who pulls you aside to give you the scoop on the place.
9. You’ll miss the old place and quickly remember why you left.
10. To make yourself feel at home, you will put some pictures on your desk and adjust the settings on your desktop.

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